My battle..

Voice

Depression and anxiety had hit me like a dagger. Every year, I make it a point to write about Depression by taking my case of depression first and then address it, in general. 5 years ago, I had my first panic attack. I had no clue of what happened and the days ensued filled with emptiness, panic attacks, excessive sleeping, sore limbs, no sleep, over thinking, at times 100 thoughts in a fraction and other times nothing at all, racing heart beat, impatience, headache, constant delirium. The symptoms were so glaring that even my close once couldn’t ignore. I had grown pale and weak. I won’t talk to people. After my college, I stayed at home for 6 months, doing nothing, in a room, staring at the wall.

when you’re fighting mental illness, you’re fighting a silent battle. No one sees just how hard you’re constantly having to fight. For…

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Interior Inspirations

IMG_20150517_102625_1For all the knowledge that I have of interior decor and dedign and general housekeeping,  I gibe the entire credit to my dear mother. Being an army wife, my mom was an active member of AWWA ( Army Wives Welfare Association ), she encouraged the soldiers’ wives of my Dad’s unit to use their talents of stitching,  embroidery and fabric painting to become independent individuals .

She used to give them tutorials about different types of embroideries she knew and new techniques like cross-stitch and french knots and organised workshops for them to master their talents and reach their zenith. Most of these classes were in the afternoons when the women were free. My mom always took me along to these classes where I would watch mesmerised as a beautiful red rose was embroidered here, a splendid hand painted creeper there. Over the years, attending these classes I gained an in depth knowledge of fabrics and textiles, handicrafts and embroidery techniques. I never knew that this was my mom’s ingenious way in training me about housekeeping values, and respecting our traditional cultural heritage.

Now these goods that werebeing produced by these ladies were being sold at special AWWA stores in Army cantts throughout the country. Stalls were put at annual and semiannual AWWA fairs, Diwali melas and celebrations at army grounds to promote this working culture.

When I reached teenage, my mom made me her secretary. I had a lovely time helping my mom with herresponsibilities. It was in one such mela that my mom came upon a set of splendid mirror work cushions. She asked me to have a look and we both agreed that they would make beautiful additions to our drawing room. They seemed the same size we needed and so we bought them.

Here, I have to add that when it comes to interior decoration,my mom is a believer of the minimalist philisophy of ‘ Less is More ‘. The same is depicted in our house. The result is a very subtle and classy look – an understated elegance. On reaching back home we found the cushions to be a smaller size than required. But what could we do now ?

My mom opened the stitches of one cushion and got it framed in a vintage frame. With another, she covered my school folder and used the third to make the edging of her dupatta. The remaining three were used as table mats for the three of us.

That day I got the message that we can use scraps of fabric, buttons, ribbons and strings to decorate one’s house free of cost. The artefacts also came out totally unique and the stories became the centre of conversation at dinner parties for a long time to come. Hats off to the design philosophy and creativity of my Mom.

Sibling stories #Rakhi #Rakshabandhan #India #Love

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My brother, my best friend, my worst critic,
Our relationship is like a crossword with the clues cryptic.
How jealous you were of me in my formative years,
As I stole your sleeping next to mommy dear.
At birthday parties, you never ate your chocolates but got them for me,
Teaching me to take out from the pod the peas.
Making stories on how our parents found me on the temple steps,
To making notes for me on food chains and food webs.
Through all the phases of life, you have helped me wade through,
Just wanted to tell you dear brother that I love you.

An ode to my bridesmaids

IMG_20160807_201203Time has come for me to be the bride,
My, bridesmaids be by my side,
From the endless hours shopping for me trousseau,
Makeupartist or wedding photographer,
For advice I always came to thee,
Your patience the most precious quality,
Your eyes see what my eyes cannot see,
From checking my phone,
To adjusting my dress,
For you I know it has been full of stress,
From applying sugar n lime juice to my henna,
To the day I became Mrs Jena
Helping me decide the venue,
To every article on the menu,
Helping me choose the right invite ,
You have taken it all in your stride.
Be it jewellery or the right shoe,
Babysitting my kitties with your coochie coos,
Giving the best Bachelorette party you could afford,
Your impromptu gig on the ladies sangeet,
To my eyes the most beautiful treat.
Calling the grooms party to check the time
To check if all was going fine
Screening the calls before handing me,
Bringing for me my favourite iced tea.
Keeping your eyes on the groom’s shoe. ,
All the tricks of the trade you knew,
In that outfit it was a pain to pee,
If you had not accompanied me.
Getting me prepped up for the entry,
To how you convinced the mess gentry.
You tolerated my each and every whim,
Thanks for being bu my side when I married him.

My Summer Reading List #books #book

Summer is the time to head to the nearest beach or hill station.
Summer is the time to sit back and relax.
Summer is the time to unwind with your favourite book.

This is my summer reading list for this year. A mix of a little vacation vibe, a little nostalgia, and a whole lot of interesting read.

1. The Inn at Lake Devine
By Elinor Lipman
Just the name of the book invited me to grab it and get transported to the summer of 1962.

2. Go set a watchman
By Harper Lee
Sequel to one of the best books I have read till date ‘ To Kill a Mockingbird Bird ‘. I can’t wait to get
my hands on this one.

3. Tourist Season
By Carl Hiaasen
Tourist season..it is about long needed vacations for us. But how is it like for people who make
most their earnings during this time – the people who migrate to tourist spots during summers to
make their annual earnings. This book got me thinking about all these things.

4. The shell
By Rosamunde Pilcher
I have had a knack of collecting shells ever since childhood. This one piqued my curiosity.. Is it
about fake pearl trade or how the shells come into being or the creatures that inhabit these
beautiful creations.

5. Unaccustomed Earth
By Jhumpa Lahiri
Ever since I read the namesake, I have become a big fan of all things ‘ Jhumpa Lahiri ‘.

6. Kim
By Rudyard Kipling
Kipling wrote this novel at the picturesque Bundi Fort in Rajasthan. That’s reason enough to read
this one.
On second thoughts, Kipling happens to be one of my favourite writers and I have been wanting to
read this one for a long, long time.

7. The Trains Now Deserted
By Micheal William.
I visited Europe as a kid and the cover transported me back to the the lush British landscape, the unforgettable train journeys, the old world charm.

8. School Days
Patrick Chamosseau
This one is make making me nostalgic even as I write this down. Who wouldn’t grab a chance to
re-live long forgotten school days again…the golden days of our life that shaped our life.

9. Sapiens : A brief history of mankind
By Noah Yuval Horan
Being a hard core anthropology fan, I never miss the chance to learn more about the human race.

10. The Body Chamber
By Angela Carter
Ghost stories make vacations all the more enjoyable by adding a bit of thrill and a tinge of nostalgia. Perfect for those long flight or train journeys.

My reasons to shop…

I love to shop,
Till the time tired I drop,
It cures me of any tension,
And provides the perfect relaxation,
The retail therapy,
Is my dexterity,
Choosing new make up,
Helps me get over a bad breakup.
Helping a friend shop for her wedding,
Or just to change the cushions and bedding.
Helps me get over my boredom,
Be it spring or autumn.
Always I have nothing to wear,
My shopping list in my mind is clear.
It instantly perks up me mood,
Helps me to avoid junk food.
Making sales girls my best friends,
My list of excuses to shop never really ends.

Getting a new job,
Or a new boyfriend called Bob.
Burning some calories,
Or recharging my dull batteries.
Saving the economy,
To get a new wardrobe for me.
Torturing the boyfriend,
Girlfriends are a God send.
To add spice to the weekend,
Many stores I can recommend.
To celebrate the loss of weight,
Or to get over a bad date.
The mention of a sale,
Make me start another shopping trail.
My reasons to shop are one too many,
Till the time I am not left with a single penny.
Oh! Please don’t ask me to stop.
All I want to do is shop shop shop.

A Saree Story

A Saree Story

I have a very interesting saree tale to share with you. Well , as we all know weddings are the time when indians buy maximum amount of ethnic wear -be it sarees, lehengas or salwar kameez. My bua’s wedding had been fixed and my mom and bua used to go out for shopping frequently leaving me in the care of my grandma. Now, on one of these shopping trips my Mom and bua fell in love with the same saree..so exquisite it was. First they thought they would buy it in different shades but only one shade was available. Neither would give up on the saree so they both bought the saree as my bua was moving out of town within a few day of marriage. My mom was pretty fond of this saree and used to wear it to all her soirées, ladies meets and weddings. After a few months of marriage my bua came visiting wearing her identical saree. I was around 2 that time and completely unaware of the double saree thing. I clung to her legs, crying uncontrollably and saying ‘Bua Mummi saii taro..Bua Mummi saii taro’.A lot of efforts were made to pacify me but to no avail. Finally, my bua gave in, folded the saree and gave it to me. I asked my mom to put it in the cupboard where our saree would have been jad it not gone to the drycleaners. My bua still teases me about this incident sayin ‘Bua Mummi saii taro’..and yes even after 25 years both of them still have that saree !